Balance
I've been thinking alot lately about balance. Not tightrope walking, either. Balancing everything in life is challenging for me sometimes. Sometimes I think I have the type of personality or brain or whatever that can only handle one task at a time. If I try to accomplish too many things at once, I get overwhelmed and shut down and do nothing. Nothing except play videogames or surf the Internet.
I'm trying to figure out how to balance my professional, personal, and social lives. Right now my professional life is finishing up my Master's degree and starting my PhD. Social life is keeping in touch with those people I care about, both friends and family. Personal life is a hodge podge of reading, eating right, staying active, and maintaining my house. All of this falls under an umbrella of living simply, something I feel very strongly about.
It's not easy for me, and I get frustrated when I don't accomplish enough in a day. I also get frustrated when I completely ignore my social life just to accomplish more for school. And vice versa. I can't tell sometimes if I'm too hard on myself or not organized enough. I feel bad when I don't get enough done for school, and I feel bad when projects at home don't get finished. I really feel bad when I see friendships detoriate because I don't spend enough time on them. Last night before I feel asleep I was feeling especially guilty about this, and began to seriously contemplate making a list of my relationships, prioritizing them, and assigning tasks such as e-mails or phone calls to nuture each relationship. That was my list-oriented mind at work. I didn't make that list, but I am contemplating it....
There is no point to this post. I don't have a punchline or funny picture at the end. I need to get these thoughts out because, well, I've been told it's good to get them out. Therapeutic and whatnot. And this is what blogs are for, right? At least it's what my blog is for. At least today. My friend B told me that it was interesting to read sometimes because it was like a diary. Lately I've been needing one. Balance.
But maybe this post does serve some purpose. In a way, it's my public apology for being so damn self-absorbed that I couldn't take the time to write, call, or visit. I'm sorry if I've been a bad friend/son/nephew/neighbor/citizen lately. I'm working on it.
I'm trying to figure out how to balance my professional, personal, and social lives. Right now my professional life is finishing up my Master's degree and starting my PhD. Social life is keeping in touch with those people I care about, both friends and family. Personal life is a hodge podge of reading, eating right, staying active, and maintaining my house. All of this falls under an umbrella of living simply, something I feel very strongly about.
It's not easy for me, and I get frustrated when I don't accomplish enough in a day. I also get frustrated when I completely ignore my social life just to accomplish more for school. And vice versa. I can't tell sometimes if I'm too hard on myself or not organized enough. I feel bad when I don't get enough done for school, and I feel bad when projects at home don't get finished. I really feel bad when I see friendships detoriate because I don't spend enough time on them. Last night before I feel asleep I was feeling especially guilty about this, and began to seriously contemplate making a list of my relationships, prioritizing them, and assigning tasks such as e-mails or phone calls to nuture each relationship. That was my list-oriented mind at work. I didn't make that list, but I am contemplating it....
There is no point to this post. I don't have a punchline or funny picture at the end. I need to get these thoughts out because, well, I've been told it's good to get them out. Therapeutic and whatnot. And this is what blogs are for, right? At least it's what my blog is for. At least today. My friend B told me that it was interesting to read sometimes because it was like a diary. Lately I've been needing one. Balance.
But maybe this post does serve some purpose. In a way, it's my public apology for being so damn self-absorbed that I couldn't take the time to write, call, or visit. I'm sorry if I've been a bad friend/son/nephew/neighbor/citizen lately. I'm working on it.
posted by ScottyB at
12:20 AM
5 Comments:
jilly, i'm glad you finished the day! sorry that i wasn't more patient with you. i remember feeling incredibly frustrated my first year as well. a road bike sounds awesome. i'm hoping to find one (extremely cheap) to ride next year!!
By
ScottyB, at 31 July, 2006 20:16
I've found that my search for balance and simplicity is really my need to control what's going on around me. Having a child (with one on the way) takes a lot of control away from you - but it's a good thing. No matter how hard I try to simplify my life, it gets more complex. However, I do have control over the stuff I buy and need to take care of - the less the better - it leaves more time to cultivate the relationships that (when I think about it) are really the most important "things" in my life. Sometimes I wonder how some people do it (all the things they seem to be able to juggle), but I've come to the conclusion that they are compromising something else in their life. Personally, I like reading a book once in a while rather than working my butt off all day and night. Hang in there, Scotty.
By
Anonymous, at 01 August, 2006 12:13
Thanks j-dub, and congratulations on soon-to-be new baby! I agree that the most important things in life are not the things you have, but the relationships and the experiences you have with the people in your life. I would choose relationships over possessions anyday. At the same time, I've overextended myself socially in the past trying to be friends with everyone. Maintaining those relationships takes time, and for me ended up causing me to neglect my self. I felt like I was defining myself based on my friends and not who I am. In response, I went to the other extreme of not socializing much at all and obviously that didn't work either.
Whew. My brain is not quite ready for deep thought at this time in the morning. Have a good day, and hope to see you soon!
By
ScottyB, at 03 August, 2006 08:07
Personally, instead of trying for balance, I prefer the old ping pong method. Bounce from one side to the other, try to stay on the table, and know you're averaging in the middle.
By
Anonymous, at 25 August, 2006 12:35
i like that analogy, heath! sometimes just keeping it on the table is the best you can hope for....
By
ScottyB, at 28 August, 2006 14:45
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